naskar-phobia.

I Didn't Just Wake Up With A Realisation.

It's A Combination ;

Of Reoccurring Dreams,

Constant Dissuading,

And My Obstinate Heart.

My Refusal To Give Up.

My Headstrong Believe And Faith In You.

Guess It's My Stubbornness That Ended Me In Such "Mock" Misery.

Think I've Long Gotten Used To Missing,

And Pining Fer You.

Yearning Fer My Love Being Reciprocated.

Thinkin That Everyone Erred,

And You Were Supposed To Fergive Me.

In The End,

I COuld'nt Think What My Offenses Were.

You Probably Had To Fergive Me,

Fer Being Young(At That POint Of Time)

Fer Being Brazen Enough To Speak My Mind.

Fer My Tantrums When You Refused To 'Communicate'.

Fer Being Child-Like,

Fer My Being Defiant,

Fer Being Naive.

I'd Racked My Brains,

But Still Could'nt Come Up With A More Appropriate Ans,

Other Than My Being Young.

In Your Eyes,

This Was Probably My Biggest Mistake.

Or Mayb You Felt That Those Self Reproaching Methods

May Really Chase Me Away Without No Rhyme Nor Reason.

I've Had Plans To Turn My World Around.

In These Plans,

I Included You.

I Too Had Blueprints 

While You'r No Longer Present.

Nothing Can Change What You Mean To Me.

I'm Definite, What We Had Was Real.

I Saw It In You'r Eyes.

I Heard It In That Voice,

I Felt It In Those Hands.

Argue If I'm Wrong.

I Learnt From Them Who' I've

Loved And Lost.

The Truest/First Hand Meaning Of A Saying-

That When You Love Someone,

You'll Have To Ultimately Let 'Em Go.

No Matter How Unwilling, How Shattered 

You May Be.

They Taught Me That The Sun Still Shines Tmr.

-It Does.

Rain Storms Still Happened Unexpectedly.

-It Does.

I'm Exhausted.

Emotionally. Mentally.

Really Exhausted.

I'd Pumped Too Much Love.

Into Relationships, Friendships And Blood Ties.

But There Some Ties That I Simply 

Can't Let Go, Nor Sever.

I Could Actually Anticipate All Of Your Reactions/Actions.

It's More Pain Than Gain In This Wait.

I Never Complain About This Tedious Wait.

Fine. I Was Stupid.

And Nopex, We Shan't Touch On Your Flaws.

It's Been Much Ranted ON.

Guess I Was Just Being Too Headstrong,

IN Believing That Love Was All About Trust, Believe And Pure Love.

Guess I Just Did'nt Want To Come To Terms With It.

Guess Cux It Was So Difficult That I Just Didnt Want To.

Its Probably Cux I Thought I Found It- Finally.

It Definately Cux I Thought I Loved You.

And Nopex, My Views Has'nt Changed.

It's Been While.

-Brin